I love shoes!

by chics on Thursday, 22 March 2012 - 2 pm · 3 comments

in shopping

I love shoes and bags. But I can go without buying new bags but not shoes. Every month, at least aku mesti beli sepasang kasut, tak kisahla berapa harga dia [kalau dapat yang 20 inggit lagi bagus].

But for the past 30 days, I have bought 3 pair of shoes.

To my defense, all of them are a must buy.

Silver-gold heels

I bought this heels when I was abroad. I needed a decent shoes to attend a wedding dan aku masa tu hanya ada boots cap cina. Apa gila nak pergi wedding dekat hotel pakai boots pink?

So I bought these. It was made from leather and the price was RM104 and they were handmade!

I mean how cheap is that? Kalau kasut dekat Charles & Keith yang keras nak mati and made from entah hapa pun dah seratus lebih,  and Aldo yang usually tiga ratus ke atas [dan bukan leather], ini leather ok!

I was very fucking happy when I bought them.

Ada lagi design lain yang aku suka, tapi besar :(

 

 

And then the second one, which I love as well.

Some tribe traditional shoes

The first time I saw them was during the wedding [one of the 4 nights event] and I instantly fall in love. Tapi  nak cari kasut ni payah, you have to go to a special place. And where I was staying ada 1 kedai je. And when I found the shop, I was overjoyed!

And I had to buy them sebab mana lagi nak jumpa?

They don’t have my size so they told me to come again after 2 days, they asked someone to fetch my shoe size from somewhere else. I ordered 2 pairs, different desigsn tapi bila aku datang balik, orang kedai tu salah order yang lagi satu design. Aku mintak design lain tapi dia pergi order design atas ni kaler hijau and brown which was salah.

Love the details

They are made from leather dan benang yang ditenun, also hand made. I am going to cut the string that holds the ankle though because they make my leg look chubbier. I haven’t been wearing them, sayanglah. Sebab kalau dah worn out tak boleh di beli dengan mudah.

The best part? They only cost RM30!

And did I tell you it’s pure leather?

 

I bought my latest purchase yesterday. Ini semua salah seorang minah yang aku nampak dekat Ikano. Aku naik escalator, terus nampak kaki dia yang sedang berjalan atas floor yang aku bakal sampai and I fall in love with her shoes.

The thing was, I didn’t know where to find such shoes until aku masuk Crocs dekat Empire.

Love at first sight

I didn’t want to buy them initially because they are crocs. I hate crocs.

Tapi bila aku sarungkan dekat kaki, oh myyy, comfortablenyaaa dan kaki aku serasi [walaupun sikit longgar].

But they didn’t have my size, which made me a bit relieved sebab harga dia adalah mahal berbanding combination kasut 1 and kasut 2 yang aku beli. Wayyy mahal.

I mean it’s made of some kind of plastic for God’s sake! Motif nak harga macam jibraun?

 

Tapiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, semalammmmmm sewaktu menunggu tetek tibaaaaa, aku telah termasuk Crocs dekat Bangsar Village. Ada saiz!

Hati berbelah bagi nak beli ke tak but then I think, I bloody need it! [Yelah, dan dan kau need it kan?]

But really, I’ll be going to Korea soon and aku perlukan kasut yang sesuai untuk berjalan dan errr shopping kasut? And anddddd kalau nak pergi jalan kaki lama-lama ke, this is the right shoes [motif defend diri gila babi?]

So I bought them.

You are mineee

 

It’s oklah, my feet need pampering too.

 

 

Tapi aku tak puas hati, macamana kasut kulit lagi murah dari kasut plastik?

Adakah harga kambing dan lembu sudah murah sekarang?

 

 

3 comments

If only I could own a gun.

by chics on Tuesday, 20 March 2012 - 8 pm · 3 comments

in angst

The other night when I was about to sleep I heard some noise coming out from my house. It was about 3 a.m [ I have problem sleeping which explained the time].

I felt so bloody scared.

What the hell was that?

Perompak? Pencuri? Hantu?

And I was sure I have locked my doors.

 

Apa yang perlu aku lakukan sekarang?

Telefon polis? Tapi takkan nak main telefon je kot tanpa mengesahkan apa bendanya?

So I thought, maybe I could go and look apa yang terjadi sebenarnya. Tapi aku terfikir, macam bodohla pulak aku nak pergi, kalau memang ada pencuri/perompak macamana? Nanti jadi macam filem-filem yang aku tengok, dah tau ada something going on, gatal jugak nak pergi tengok. Last-last terkorban.

That was the time when I thought, alangkah bagusnya kalau ada pistol.

 

You see, I have experienced shooting a gun before. Can’t remember the type though.

And I managed to capture a video, tapi masalahnya hari adalah sangat gelap, so excuse the video yang sedikit kelam, just focus on the sound ok?

It was awesome, the rush when I pulled the trigger and hearing the bammm was so awesome. Make me want to own a fucking gun so bad.

 

If I owned a gun, that night I imagined myself tiptoeing di tangga sambil mengacukan pistol, ala-ala cerita detektif omputih. And then when I see the pencuri I will point the gun to him/them and said

“Get the hell out of my house. I am not afraid to shoot!”

atau kalau dia nampak macam tak reti cakap omputih,

“Baik kamu keluar sekarang, kalau tak saya tembak!!” [Eh ni dah macam gerak khasla pulakk]

 

Style tak?

Hahahahahaha.

 

But to own a gun here adalah susah and if I own a gun, bukan perompak/pencuri tu je yang mati aku tembak tapi mungkin dah ramai orang yang mati.

Antaranya cibai-cibai yang tak reti nak bagi signal masa tukar lane, yang tak reti nak beratur bila naik LRT or bayar barang dekat supermarket dan ramai lagi [wahh ramai lagi tu hehe]

Macam best hehehe.

 

Anyway, bunyi yang aku dengar tu?

Bunyi kucing aku menguis pasir nak berak.

 

 

3 comments

Sihiran gila

by chics on Saturday, 17 March 2012 - 5 pm · 11 comments

in deep thinking,sadness

For those who are close to me, probably they know that I have been to so many ustaz to be ‘cured’.

Since I was a teenager, I always see, feel ‘things’ until the extent I thought I must be going mad. During my wedding night, when we were about to sleep, I felt that a hand touched my tummy, I thought it was my husband but he was lying down facing the other side and he claimed it was not his ‘hand’.

I also saw a lady crawling outside my bathroom as well as sitting in my side on the driver’s seat somewhere around last year.

Well, to be honest, I am really bothered about this thing but I am too tired to do anything about it.

Why too tired? Because I have been dragged to see so many healers by my mom since I was 17. I am tired of mandi beras, mandi bunga, mandi sireh, eating this and drinking that.

Some of the method was excruciating as well till the extent my father and my uncle had to hold my feet but I managed to kicked free. That time, the healer pressed my peranakan [one of the points], he was not actually pressing but just put his finger on it but the pain was like bloody fucking sakit until aku meraung macam perempuan nak bersalin.

 

At this moment, my uncle was suffering from a disease which claimed to be nothing by the hospital but he couldn’t breath whenever he’s at home or in fact in any places except in the car. My uncle and my aunt have been berumah tangga inside the car since December.

He had small glasses coming out from his body during his treatment from one of the healers of ustaz.

He had also shrunk so much, suffering.

 

Yesterday, I called my mum asking whether she will be back at the kampung because I want to join her. She said no, they [ my mom and aunties] have been at my uncle house since Wednesday. She asked me to come to see my uncle. I was thinking, his condition must have been worst so I decided to come.

 

So I went there today.

Only  to find that my uncle have improved tremendously [which was quite a miracle since he was almost..well you know] and my mum had actually arranged for the ustaz to meet me.

Sigh.

 

It’s not I don’t believe. As a muslim there is such thing as evil spirit,djin and buatan orang but I had enough to be honest.

This uztas is a Palestenian, he hold a Malaysian PR because of his connection with one of the ministers – he teaches the whole family islamic studies and also the teacher for my mom kelas tafsir.

He is a hafiz since he was 7 years old and had his education at Madinah.

 

He asked me few questions, some of them are odd like which one do you love the most, your father or mother. I mean how can I answer that? But I did anyway. No points for guessing who.

And he asked me, did I dream of anything scary?

I did. I always dream of drowning, leaving my husband for one of my exes,  breastfeeding a satanic looking baby and some other things that I cannot remember.

He asked again, did I always feel sleepy during the evening towards maghrib?

The answer is a big yes. I always feel extremely sleepy during that time and when maghrib came, I will feel sad, depressed and scared for the reason that I couldn’t figure out.

Did my joints, hips, head, legs feel painful or numb? – Yes, everyday.

Do I always lost my things or couldn’t remember certain things which include things that I was currently doing? – A big yes

I also told him I have been seeing, hearing and feeling things which are not supposed to exist.

 

Then he told me.

There are two things inside me.

One – evil spirit/djin

Two – sihir.

 

The sihir part however is nearly reaching it’s limit – the moment you keep losing your mind, losing your things, couldn’t remember what you were doing this is a big sign of the sihir already spreading to your brain, eating your memory. It is supposed to drive me mad and eventually I will be come completely crazy. The person who did this wants me to end up crazy.

He said I am supposed to become crazy anytime now but I am still here perhaps because

a) Iman

b) I am fighting

I think it’s the latter because Iman..err honestly I am lacking in that. I also think the support from my family and friends helped me a lot.

 

I did not tell him that I am suffering from depression, that sometimes makes me think sooner or later I will end up being crazy. Even I am on medication, I still think of hurting myself and sometimes to take my life away.

 

I do not know how to handle this, I mean to believe this or not but trust me, I have been suffering this for quite a long time, long even before I admitted I was having depression. I mean it could be just depression isn’t it?

My husband lagilah tak percaya. He used to disapprove me going to the healers but nobody would understand that I would do anything to get rid of these things that I cannot explain myself. Be it medically or using healers/ustaz.

 

Well, seeing my uncle improved tremendously within few days, I decided to give it a try, after all his method only required me to sit still while he recites the Quran, unlike some other method where I has to be sprayed, pinched, poked and other things that I really don’t want to go through.

And I do want to live again, feeling alive and all.

 

What I don’t understand is, if such thing is true why the hell does anyone want to sihir or santau other people? Yes, you feel angry but don’t we all? I do feel like I want to kill people sometimes but if I really want to do it, I wouldn’t do it in a chicken shit way like this. I rather do it my self, shot them or something.

But of course I am not going to kill anyone, who am I to prosecute anyone?

 

Sure you feel puas hati and laughed hahaha padan muka kau, mamposla kau situ but hey, in the end you still have to crawl asking for forgiveness during the judgement day don’t you?

11 comments