I often heard my girlfriends say these words. They claimed that they helpless, the wish they could do something to be treated right.
They are helpless, yes but they CAN have do something to be treated right. I don’t like to think my self as an expert because haha all of us know that I am not but I speak from my own experience and observation. From my past mistakes.
If you want to get the treatment you should be getting, start from the beginning, se awal yang mungkin. And have a strong, firm heart. Wobbly heart tidak akan membantu.
- Don’t ever take something that does not belongs to you
You want to take something which belong to someone else and then you expect to be happy? Ok yes, let the best women win but heh remember, if he can choose you over his ex, he can also choose someone else in the future over you.
- Know what you want
The problem with all of us women [including me hehe], sometimes we don’t know what we want. Event when it comes to order food, we are still not sure and ended saying
“You order ajelah apa-apa untuk I”.
Tak pun tengah bergaduh-gaduh when the guy asked “Tell me what do you want me to do ?” , engkau terdiam sebab tak tau nak jawab apa. So before asking for attention, love or whatever, determine what you want. Nak suruh urutkan kaki ke, nak suruh bawakkan shopping be or whatever you want
- Tell him what you want
Women have extra senses, they can sense certain things [or perasan boleh sense certain things hehe] but not men. Walau macamana kuat pon kuasa telepathic kau, dia takkan paham, you need to tell them or give a VERY OBVIOUS hint. Hint-hint sipi-sipi tidak akan berjaya.
Usual method: Bestkan kalau dapat pergi Genting?
Correct way: I nak pergi genting, jom?Jomlaaaaaaaaaaa jomlaaaaaaaaaaaa. Kalau you tak nak, I tarik handbrake ni [hehe tambah second ayat itu jika anda perempaun saiko]
Usual method: *Jeling-jeling bag
Correct way: I want this handbag. Maybe not this month, but next month please?
Yela memang bestla kan surprise surprise tapi tak best ok bila kau dah kasi hint dia tak buat-buat jugak, lepas tu mulala nak cakap “you tak paham perasaan I”. Nak paham apa, dah kau tak cakaaaaap.
- Say please and thank you
Sometimes I can’t help noticing some women are rude or doesn’t seem know how to give the smallest credit to their partner. Ada yang wahhh lagi depan orang lagi garang siap order-order tapi yang terover PDA aku menyampah jugak rasa macam woi balikla woii aku nak lepak bukan nak tengok B grade teen movie. Saying please or thank you will not hurt you. Make it a habit from now on. If you can say please and thank you to your boss, why can’t you do the same to your partner?
- Never ever unhook your bra to make him loves you
This is what I alwayssssssssss hear from my girlfriends.“I don’t knowlah babe, he’s so loving and caring tapi after that dia angkat call aku pon tak”
Like duh. Of coursela he’s so loving, dia nak pepet kau. If he really wants you, he will wait and would not mind just keluar jalan-jalan makan-makan. Unless you guys want to have fun and does not need attachment itu lainlah.
But NEVER EVERRRRR berbogel in front of a man to make him loves you, unless you guys are married [ini pon ikut mood jugakla kan hehe]
- Stay calm during arguments
If he yelled, you don’t have to, try to use your calmness to make him realize yelling is not helping.Anger management could be quite an issue. Jarang nak tengok lelaki menjerit tapi kadang-kadang memang ada lelaki suka nak tinggi-tinggi suara menyebabkan darah kau naik. But when he raised his voice and you raised your voice too, things will get ugly. Instead of competing whose voice can reach the top note, why don’t you calm yourself and ask him nicely or tell him that his high pitch is so not nice to hear.
I know sakit dalam hati Tuhan yang tahu but you will appear less stupid compared to him. And he might calm down too thus save both of your energy bergaduh. Tapi kalau dia jenis lelaki gampang, nak jugak maki-maki kau dan pukul-pukul kau, kau tak payah banyak cakap, blah je lepas tu biar dia menggelupur sendiri.
- Teach him how to respect you
First, you must respect yourself. Knows your limit untuk bergurau or menerima cercaan. Memanglah boleh ditegur tapi takdela sampai kau dah kene maki habis-habisan kau nak diam. Also, being together does not mean you have to share everything, you have the right not to give the password to your email address, facebook accounts or apa-apa lagi. Itu semua privacy tapi kalau nak kau nak kasi jugak, then it’s up to you just that, I still think you need to let him respect your privacy.
Oh also, you should do the same to him, screening his phone calls and emails are not good ok.
- Kau jangan mengamuk-ngamuk tak pepasal boleh tak?
Oh yes bloody hormones, don’t we hate them? Like you, he also does not like to be yelled, cursed tak bersebab. Ehem, I always have this problem especially bila aku nak period. Akan ada satu perasaan taik datang yang kalau silap sikit komfem aku rasa nak tolak-tolak dan tumbuk-tumbuk sambil cakap
“you bodohhhhhhh you bodohhhh you tak paham I eeeeee I nak gigit youuu nak tumbukkkkkk”
but instead of doing that I will say “ I think I am not in a good mood, might be getting my menses soon and might be a bitch. Sorry ok kalau kejap lagi muka I macam taik ” . Sometimes, when you are lucky, he will picit-picit your badan and bring you a cup of tea.So sebelum kau jadi perempaun gila, tell him how you are feeling. Nicely
- Knowing when to say sorry and when not to
Say sorry when it’s your fault, ego will not bring you further when it comes to the person you love. There’s nothing wrong with being humble but you don’t have to say sorry when it’s not your fault.
Example: You found out that your partner is seeing someone else, you confront him and he starts yelling, so you pon apa lagi hotlakan, gaduh-gaduh, defend-defend, tipu-tipu, you ended up apoligising, instead of him doing do
That, you shouldn’t do.
- Accept his flaws and tell him he should to
Kalau dah muka dan gaya dia macam Mahmud bin Jasin janganlah kau berharap suatu hari nanti dengan pertolongan tangan fashionista kau dia akan bertukar menjadi Brad Pitt. Mungkin dia bolehla bertukar kejap dengan segala DKNY, Armani Exchange dan segala nenek brand tapi kejap je tu. Kalau dah seumur hidup dia pakai seluar cap nyonya, nanti 5 tahun akan datang dia tetap akan kembali pakai seluar cap nyonya. Percayalah cakap aku, jadi either kau terima dia as Mahmud bin Jasin atau kau carikla orang lain.
Juga, you should tell him the same, your raisins tits will not turns into watermelon no matter how often he sucked and modified it [naturally tapikan]. Terima jelah tetek kecik. Kalau tak nak, belahla wey, suka akula nak tetek kecik ke apa.
Eh teremo.
Bottom line is, if you can’t accept his flaws and expect him to change, tsk tsk you better think twice.
- Always learn from mistake
Whatever is done, is done, you can never undo them but what you can do is making sure they will never happen again.
Do not ignore the familiar signs; do not fall for the same sayang cinta tak-boleh-hidup-tanpa-you kawen line unless he shows some proofs.
Kuatkan hati tu sikit. Takpela kalau terlepas pon, bukannya berkualiti sangat pon. Sekejap je dari lepas ni kau menangis menonggeng-nonggeng.
- Knowing when to let go
Sometimes, no matter how much you love someone, when they are not meant for you, they will never be. I am not saying that you should give up easily, no cuma when they are obvious sign, maybe it’s time for you to leave. What signs?
I don’t know that much but I can think of some
- When he starts to hit you. Hit as in tumbuk terajang. Don’t tell me you still want stick with a dickless guy like this?
- When you caught him cheating more than once or twine or even thrice. Enough saidla kan?
- When you spent more time crying in your relationship rather than feeling happy and blessed
Pedih memang pedih tapi sampai bila nak tunggu, sampai dah anak lapan?
But the most important thing is, before anything, love and value yourself, because if you don’t nobody would.
