From the category archives:

Menggelupur

Note: This entry might contains some sensitive elements

I’ve been wanting to write but was caught up in doing something else. I even tak sempat to reply your comments but I promise I’ll do it. Just bear with me ok.

Actually I wanted to write about my trip to Cameron Highlands tapi for now aku takde mood sebab gambar aku masa trip tu semua adalah tembam. Dah photoshop pon macam gagal. So itu aku hold dulu, lepas aku apply lipstick tiruan dekat gambar tu maybe aku akan reconsider.

Anyway, as I am writing aku, I am suffering from kebengkakan vagina due to UTI. Benci ok, selalu gila kene benda ni. But this time it was inevitable since my v is very sensitive – I went for a pap smear the day before.

It was not actually pap smear merelylah, I also underwent a series of test. Yang sangat menakutkan. Kalau ikut hati aku ni, tak hingin aku nak pergi but I was advised by my doctor dan dia telah Berjaya menyaiko aku when I told her I don’t think it was necessary.

Apa yang menakutkan?

Pengambilan darah sebanyak 3 tube. I know some of you might say, eleh bukannya banyak pon but hoh, the idea seeing a needle poking my skin dan darah masuk ke dalam tube adalah ngeri. Dahla darah aku macam degil, tak nak keluar, kene tunggu lama baru nak keluar.

:(

Sakit ok.

I did not realize how hard I genggam my tangan, lepas dah kluar baru aku sedar, tapak tangan aku berbekas dek kene cengkaman kuku.

Berbekas

Itu ngeri tapi tak sengeri cerita lepas ni.

Sekali nurse tu panggil masuk dalam satu bilik. I saw a petticoat on a bed [ala katil dekat klinik untuk baring tu la]

“Tukar kain ye, bukak sluar. Sluar dalam pon bukak”

I was like haaaa? Bukak seluar dalammm?

Ok, takpe aku bukak jugalah, lepas tu dia suruh baring. Aku pon baring sambil berfikir, apsalla nak kene baring bagai . Gila bangang aku ni kan, clueless gila. Seriesly I have no idea what was going to happen.

Tiba-tiba doctor datang and suruh spread the legs.

Wtffffffffffffffff laaaaaaaaaaaaaa, aku dahla tak pakai spender niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Kau jangan buat camnilaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

“Jangan segan ye Sharina, saya nak cek ni”

Manala aku tak segan, lepas je dia cakap macam tu, nurse tu pergi bukak lampu untuk suluh pulakkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk.

Apakahhhhhhhhhhhh okkkkkkk.

Masa ni aku macam.. fuckla.. memangla aku suka bogel tapi bukan begini ok. Jangan suluh-suluhla, there’s nothing to see.

“ Ok, jangan angkat punggung, I am going to insert something, it won’t be painful but there will be a slight discomfort”

What something? Apakah something itu? Tell me. Tell meee

Dari posisi berbaring I saw her holding something that looked like spatula yang kepalanya agak weird, macam bentuk sudip cake or something. As she put on her gloves aku punya lutut dah mengigil.

Habislaaaaaahhh akuuuu. Kenapalah I agreed to go for this thing at the first place?

Luckily the doctor was very gentle and she knew how to take away my fear, setiap kali dia buat something she will tell me, sebagai contoh “ok, sekarang I am going to twist this thing to 360 degress..bla..blaa” so aku takdela rasa sengal sangat.

It was not painful tapi macam dia cakaplah, ada a slight discomfort.

Yang kiutnyalast sekali dia cakap

“Good Sharina, very brave and your v is very healthy [wtfla kan?]”

I still have to wait for the proper result though, the nurse said she will call me once the result is ready. I hope everything will be ok.

Tapikan, aku punyalah jakun + happy sebab dah Berjaya melalui pap smear yang ngeri.

Cuma tulah.

Hari ni aku dapat that bloody UTI. Sakit ok, rasa macam kene rogol dengan 10 orang [macamlah pernah kene rogol pon kan]

Hopefully besok dah baik, tak tahanlah asyik terkepit je. Tak suka tau!

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Yeay but yucks

by chics on 10 November 2009 · 16 comments

in Menggelupur, life

Note: Gross entry ahead.

Lubang bilik air in my toilet telah beberapa hari tersumbat. Not really tersumbatla tapi after a while air akan bertakung and that’s so yucky. I will tip toed when it happened dan akan mandi dalam bathtub walaupun pakai shower – untuk mengelakkan air itu naik eeeee.

Ini bukan lubang jamban ok tapi lubang saliran bilik air tu.

toilet drain

The thing is I hate to call the plumber sebab ala ni mesti benda kecik and kalau dia datang mesti charge macam gila. I don’t think the other person will do anything about it. He’s too busy, balik pon dah malam buta plus I don’t want to spoil his mood by membebel suruh buat itu dan ini. Aku bingit gila kalau mak aku membebel suruh itu suruh ini especially bila aku penat so I don’t see why I should do it to other people.

No, I am not trying to show that I am nice, just that aku malas nak bicker over small things. Dari benda kecik nanti boleh buat sakit hati 2-3 hari yang komfem akan membencikan [apakah?]

Life is too short untuk kau sakit hati benda macam nilah aku rasa. Walaupun kadang-kadang agak panas hati juga tapi bila aku pikir balik takpela chics, kau bukannya cacat tak boleh buat sendiri.

So todayyyyy aku dah tak tahan dah sebab ah beng suka gila kencing dekat toilet tu padahal dah sediakan satu toilet untuk dia. So baunya adalah hancing, aku ingat aku kencing atas tilam masa tido haha sebab hancing gila tapi sebenarnya ah beng punya kerja.[the toilet is in my room]

When I washed ittttttttttttttt, lubang jahanam tu pun menakung air. Eeeeeeeeeeeeekkk gross okkkkkkkkkkkkk?

And I was thinking, sampai bila nak biarkan je niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii? The other person will be gone in few days dan adakah aku sanggup nak guna toilet macam tu ditambah pulak dengan kucing-kucing aku yang beruk?

Despite I have no idea what to do aku reti-retikan jugak. I assume something must have stucked inside sebab bila aku guna pelocok tak nak jalan jugak. Mesti ada benda yang masuk sebab penutup lubang bilik air tu terbukak – ni kerja ah beng juga, I caught him few times menguis benda tu. Apa yang dia dengki sangat dengan penutup tu pun aku tak tahu.

Nak tak nak I search for a lidi and began to mengorek.

Masa korek tu air dah kering, jadi hasil pengorekan tak berapa berjaya because the small lidi tak berjaya membawa whatever it is keluar dari lubang.

Tapi masa tengah korek, I saw something, like a lidi also dan yeeeeeeee aku masukkan 2 jari seperti me-finger lubang itu sambil mengepit the-so-called lidi andddddddddd terkeluarlah something yang berupanya lidi tapi sebenarnya berus lukisan.

Mula-mula aku macam.. alamak ni berus mekap aku ke tapi bila aku tengok bebetul oh bukan, nasib baik hehe

Like WTF ok? Apa jadah nak masukkan berus lukisan dalam lubang toilet niiiiiiiiii?

Yucks yang pertama.

Disebabkan tak boleh nak keluarkan apa-apa lagi I decided to flood the lubang dan kacau. Macam bila kau kacau air the ada serdak, bila cawan penuh, kau kacau mesti serdak dia naik.

Fucking yucks but too late to stop.

So bila lubang tu dah flooded aku pon kacau/godak dengan menggunakan lidi itu. Bau dia adalah macam sial. Tak dapat aku nak gambarkan, kalaulah blog ni boleh menyalurkan bau, memang aku dah salurkan haha.

Kemudian timbullah segala setan mak nenek, batu [batuuuuuuuuuu? Okla fine dia macam marmar sket kot], rambut dan entah apa lagi yang aku malas nak tengok sebab tekak dah kembang [mintak-mintakla takde taik dan sewaktu dengannya]

Yucks yang kedua

Last-last bila dah kacau and nothing timbul, I use the pelocok anddd in a snap terus surut airnyaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Dan terus clearrrrrr

I was happy but berdiri bulu romala jugak. It’s like yeayyyyyyyyyyy but yucks macam tu.

Please don’t keji me, maybe this is a normal thing for you tapi bukan untuk aku yang penggeli dan pemalas ini so sebab itulah aku berasa sedikit riak haha [poyo gila unclog lubang toilet pon nak riak?]

I am feeling content despite ada lagi siri perasaan celaka yang bersarang dalam hati.

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What happened

by chics on 23 September 2009 · 11 comments

in Menggelupur, internet thingy

chics

Ini adalah teaser [macamlah ada yang terteasekan chehhh] sahaja, getik nak letak gambar raya tapi pasal raya nantilah aku cerita

Anyway what happened to the blog?

Haihhh.

Tak, tak I did not banned everybody, tak tukar url and tak quit blogging.

Few months back I told swirly website ni nak expire but he said rileksla, ni semua auto renew ni plus the whois showed that registration expired in 2010.

Least that he know the registrar adalah bodoh. Salah update. What make it difficult, the domain was registered at other host, bukan dreamhost sebab masa tu dreamhost tak buat registration.

Nak dijadikan ceritaaaaaaaaaaaa hilang password pulakkk bila nak log in dekatt host tu 1. Nak retrieve password pulak leceh gila, nak kene fax driving license apa bagai. Dah 2 kali fax tak settle jugak. Last sekali attach je dalam email. The password retrieval process took 1 week ok!

Macam taik lamanya.

Lepas tu pulak sebab dah expired kene denda, instead of paying the usual USD10 kene bayar USD 160 dalam RM600++.Kepala hotakla nak bayar banyak tu, dahla tak hantar reminder ke apa ke kan, tiba-tiba je nak charge banyak tu. So we appeal pulakkkk. That also took few days,last-last dapat kurang. Takdela sampai USD10 but atleast tak payahla aku bayar RM600++ [baik aku buat open house je macam tu ok]

Finally bila dah settle, the DNS update took sooooooooooo fucking long. Usually 24 to 48 hours tapi ni ambik masa 3 sampai 7  hari.

Bernanah otak aku tunggu.

Tapi takpe, lesson leant, after 60 days akan move the registration to Dreamhost. Walaupon ramai orang kutuk dreamhost, I have to say the customer service adalah the best.

Nyehahah sorrylah entry boring but I prefer to sexplain rather than leave you bunnies in the dark.

Okies, next etry otak bernanah rayaaaaaa.

You wait aaaa

  1. email me if you want to know the name, shall no tell here

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