Finally it’s year and. Another year has passed us by.Lots of things happen.How r u going to clebrate today?I will be celebrating..most probobly at home je kot or maybe..I dunno..since parties has been cancelled.

Anyway, I’m on half day today people and 1 more hour to go.Yeehaaa..But..apa aku nak buat lepas ni?hishhh!!

What ever it is..

happy new year!!

apsal aku rasa sedih lak ni?iskhhh…

I have reoccurring dreams which is normal right?But this one, scare the shit outta me.It happens in 3 sequels, like on the first night I will dream about the first part, second night, second part and so on…

Part 1

I befriended with a gurl. She’s famous and pretty.She’s also nice and everybody likes her and sort of worship her. We became best friend and start hanging out together. Everyone knows that we are like sooo best friend, unseparable.

Part 2

I don’t know what happen but I remember tearing her flesh from her body into pieces. My hands are covered with her blood. She’s dead and I killed her. Still remember how I rip off her body and slowly began to tear he flesh pices by pieces.I don’t know what happen and why I killed her but I know it was me. Blood was everywhere, my clothes we soaked with her blood and my room began to stinks..and my cats just watch me and sometime they lick the blood.To clear the evidence, I tear all her flesh and her organs and throw them to the sea where fishes will ate her remaining flesh or they will rot later.

Part 3

The remaining evidence is still with me, her skeleton.What did I do with them?I buried them under my bed.Underneath the cement under my bed. When gone missing everybody started to look for her. My mom keep asking me questions and everywhere I walked all people do is keep talking about her. Saying that they sware that the will find the murder. Bloody hell.I was scared. The scary feeling is the as as when ur high on marijuana and your friends joke about calling the cops. That kind of scared. I keep telling myself that I’m dreaming.

Even when I woke up I still feel so scared and believe I had killed someone and stuff then under my bed.

The worst part is.. I keep dreaming about it for almost everyday.But that was 2 years ago.

I don’t dream about it anymore but I keep thinking about it..means i keep thinking about that dream..What the hell is that supposed to mean?What is it that it wants me to know?

Or just put it this way, mimpi hanyalah mainan tidur..ait??

Ok. So I decided that I’m going to be a party gurl again.I know some of you will mock me but. Who the hell are you?Do you think I give a shit? Noooo..

Amir you are right..I shall do whatever I want. Shall go partying and wasting and what so ever coz life is too precious to waste.Shall be pretty and shall be slim.Shall keep the chubby ass and shall have killer legs.

You see..All bastards in this world shall pay.

Go, go, go, go

Go, go, go shawty

It’s your birthday

We gon’ party like it’s yo birthday

We gon’ sip Bacardi like it’s your birthday

And you know we don’t give a fuck

It’s not your birthday!

I just want to dissapear.Like vanish into this thin air.

So that nobody can see me and nobody will try to hurt me.

It hurts when all the things that you believe turn out to be a lie

It hurts when the person who u trust the most, who you seek for comfort turn their back on you.

I don’t think I can take this life anymore.

Why is that everytime I give my all..the best that I have in me..

They will coma back to me in a bad way?

Am I not deserve to be love..at all?

Please help me..please help me..please help me..please help me..

Lat night I was so boring and lonely, practically got nothing to do.Was exhausted playing games or even to read books. So I flipped through my album and reminisce and for all the sudden i felt..rindu..

These were[still are] girls that I used to hang out with. Despite our crazy and scary behavior we are bunch of civilized people now. Fadzi is an auditor, Zaireen an engineer, Nikkit is pursuing her MBA, Nik a lawyer, Shaza the KFC Asst Manager, errr..and that’s me, Tini a mother to be and a Sales Exec and finally Lina the Add Math teacher[ajar set 1 lagi ok..]. Me and Nik see each other quite often. We used to hang out with Nikkit and Fadzi but since Nikkit went to Aust and Fadzi is super duper bz pursuing her MICPA ..so it’s just me and Nik.

Anyway, my point is..Aku rindu masa-masa berlari ke dining hall and round compound. I don’t know for you guys but for me, my school sistas are uncomparable.Definetely the best’est’ friends I ever known.

Luv you guys.Mwah!