November 2004

I used not to care about what people say about me. Whether they like me or not. I mean, if they don’t like me..too bad and I’m not going to change myself just to make those people like me.Not that i care anyway. And if someone mess with me I don’t give a shit about that person, if they talk to me or whatever I would totally ignored them, pretending that they are invisible.

I used to wonder why some people really feel miserable if they found out that someone doesn’t like them. I mean, nobody’s perfect so if let say someone doesn’t like you..it’s their choice and it’s totally normal.

But I guess, things change. Perception change.Now I do care about ‘certain’ people perception. They hate me and because of that my life had turn upside down for the past few months.For the first time in my life I started to think what should i do to make them like me. Should I change my sense of dressing?Should I lower down my voice while talking or issit that I should tone my big but?This is sick. Why should I change for them..Oh I forgot..becuase I’m so madly in love with their son .

Enough craps. Anyway, today I went to see a client at Damansara Height. I was so famous with my bad sense of direction. Avoiding being lost I took a cab, a PJ cab. I told the driver where I wanted to head to and he asked me.

“Miss, Awak tau ke jalan nak pegi sana?Boleh tunjuk tak?”

Duh, bang..Kalau saya tau jalan..Takdela saya naik cab…

Bukan sepatutnya cab-cab kat sini hustler dalam bab-bab jalan ke?

Ke dia saje buat-buat sesat sebab nak charge aku lebih?

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As i had guess..U never learn your lesson.

Now that everythings has shattered..

I have only one thing to say

I wish that you won’t be happy in everything you do.

I wish that even you get married to someone else you still can’t erase my image in your head.

I wish even you sleep with her at night, you will always smell my scent around you.

I wish that you will regret that you almost get me but you don’t

I will haunt you forever

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