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The camp

by chics on 9 February 2010 · 4 comments

in emo, feminism, life

I am back!

Tapi masih penat sebab tu baru hari ni nak update.

Actually the camp was meant for girls from homes. Meaning girls from orphanages dan bukannya untuk aku but I was therelah.

Anyway it was all fun. I slept in a sleeping bag for two days with no bantal [tapi second night a friend of mine bawakkan bantal] and mandi dengan air yang bapak sejuk.

The most important past was, the girls – who came from not so fortunate backgrounds managed to have fun and learn lots of things.

Adalah menitik air mata when I talked to one of them and the told me

“Saya tingkatan 2 tapi saya sekolah OKU kakak, emak ada, tak kerja. Ayah tak tahu mana. Saya selalu rindu emak “

Imaginelah, you are disabled and your mum cannot afford to jaga you so she had to send you somewhere. You understand but at the same time you just miss her so much.

Aku ni ha, barulah beberapa hari tak dapat cakap and jumpa dengan emak dah rasa rindu, inikan pulak diorang. Lagi sedih they knew that their parent send them sebab sayang. Tapi soalannya, kalau sayang kenapa we cannot be together?

That girl asked me to write my name in a piece of paper along with my phone number. She promised to call me form the home. Sebak ok masa tu especially when she hugged me and asked me whether or not I will come to visit her in the future.

Another girl wrote me a poem

Some love lone

Some love two

But I love you

And that is you, akak Sharina.

Don’t forget me ok!

She told me she created that especially for me. I don’t knowlah but I feel flattered even it was so simple.

At the beginning, the girls were quite degil tak nak dengar cakap but after sometimes when you show them that you care for them, eat with them and luagh with them, they opened up dan then is when they show how loving, caring and smart they are.

Ok, aku pon tak tahu apasal aku tulis entry emo macam ni but I cannot help wondering kenapalah ada orang yang hanya reti produce kids but never want to think about what will happen to the kids sedangkan dia awal-awal dah tahu they cannot afford to give their kids even the basic things? Especially love.

I think that’s cruel.

Anyway, I hope they will benefit from the camp and despite being in their condition, they will not lose hope and believe, they too deserve to be happy and have fine things in life like everyone else.

P/S. Sorry, no pictures. I don’t feel comfortable to display them here.

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Going camping

by chics on 5 February 2010 · 6 comments

in crap

Bunnies!

I am going camping from today onwards until Sunday. I what you are thinking, chics going camping? Like wtf righttt?

Never in my wildest dream that I will go camping, being a mengada person, camping is not my thing. But guess what I am going.

Weird thing is, I am hoping that I will have fun.

Ok got to go, got some stuff to settle.

You bunnies enjoy your weekend okies?

Hughug + kisskiss

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Managing my nagaan

by chics on 4 February 2010 · 8 comments

in crap

How do you control your anger?

When I was young, I let anger control my life. Bukan bermaksud sekarang aku tak marah, marahhhhhhhhh but back then I used to handle it differently.

Dulu, kalau aku marah, I would not filter my words, apa yang aku marah itula yang keluar. Kadang-kadang marah itu ditranslatekan dengan membelasah orang dengan handphone atau apa-apa yang ada.

It didn’t get me anywhere, cuma banyak sakit hati dan rasa tak best sebab I keep hurting those who I care the most [well some of them used to be lah]

As grow older I learn how to hold my tongue and control myself. Walaupun berdasarkan marah pada blog ini macam tak betul tapi percayalah in real life ianya betul.

So how do I control my anger now?

I sleep over it. Ataupon aku melengahkan perasaan marah tu, buatla benda lain dulu dari terus tekan keyboard atau call sesapa yang berkenaan untuk kene hembusan api nagaan aku.

Melengahkan perasaan nak memaki/menaga taught me to jangan melayan manusia-manusia bodoh ataupon will give me time to accept sememangnya akulah manusia bodoh itu dan mistake itu memang aku yang buat. So deal with it and improve. I mean manusia mana suka kene tegur especially when you think are not wrong tapi kadang-kadang memang wrong pon so terima jelah kan hehe.

Speaking of manusia bodoh, ramai sangat till the extent I wanted to lodge a police report tapi bila aku pikir, aduhh pegila mampus diorang ni. Lagi aku layan lagi mengada nanti so jalan terbaik abaikan. Jangan aku join sama jadi bodoh sudahla kan.

Although kadang-kadang you have to deal with some shit yourself, depends on situationlah.

But yeah, I learned that anger is an ugly thing. Especially when it is towards the people that you care.

Ok, tu je. Have a great day bunnies!

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