The angels they burn inside for us

in deep thinking

Here I am again.

Lots of things in my mind but can’t seem to write them down.

Clouded.

 

 

I am thinking this blog no longer serves me the the purpose that I intended it to be.

So I am thinking to shut it down.

 

I am not sure about it though.

 

It’s not that I don’t want to write, I want to but I feel perhaps it’s good to put the past behind and forget everything?

Does that make sense to you?

 

But that does not mean I won’t continue somewhere else. Maybe a different name, different face but the same soul :)

 

 

Drama tak drama sekarang?

 



{ 1 shake }

It is 4.30 pm

in emo, family

Ayah,

It has been 2 years today.

I told my self not to cry instead I will remember you with a smile. But I failed when I came across this picture.

I used to cry of missing you but now I also cry for emak, knowing how lonely she gets without you around. Sometimes she confessed she that she has no one to talk to especially that I am no longer in Shah Alam.

And it breaks my heart.

 

She misses you.

 

I have lost words to describe my heartache and lost counts of tears cried at night.

 

Sometimes I feel the world is so cruel, so difficult to live in and it is unfair that I no longer have you around as my comfort. There are countless times when I replayed the memories of all of us together in my head just to imagine your face, just to hear you laugh.

 

It hurts so much that I could feel like my heart would burst.

 

 

2 years toda,y ayah. But not a day passed without you in my heart.

 

I shall wait for the day that we can be together as a family again.

 

And I will always be your little girl.

 

 

 

 



{ 1 shake }

Erghhh

in crap

Hari ni berkobar nak update blog but as I switched o the laptop, I saw that the settings in Chrome have changed. My extensions are no longer there and my bookmarks are missing.

I did not save the latest setting.

Maybe it is nothing to you but it is something important to me. I love my settings – extensions and bookmarks. Thankfully, I pinned most of things that I find these days.

Anxiety attack ruined my mood to blog.

Instead I went to the toilet and berak, that’s what happen every time I have that sort of panic attack. Which is sort of good since I have been constipating ever since the shark week arrived.

 

Enough of cerita taik.

 

Now, I want to mandi, sapu some lotion and sidai baju. And then perhaps I would go for some japanese lunch.

Besok-besok jelah aku update bebetul.



{ 0 shake-shake }

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